Communication Skills Workshop

Presentation used in 1999 Workshop

Basic Characteristics of Communication

·Communication has to be a cooperative process.

·Communication is irrevocable.

·You cannot not communicate.

·What and how we communicate can vary greatly depending on our cultural background, gender, family environment, and education.

·If you can communicate about 50% of your ideas, you’re doing well.

Mediums of Communication

·Verbal

·Nonverbal (body language, proximity, facial expressions, clothing and paraphernalia)

·Tool Assisted (documents, overhead projectors, pictures)

·Using multiple mediums of communication can be very effective.

Good Communication Habits

· Clarity First - Speak slowly and clearly.(Write concisely and purposefully.)

·Use good active listening skills.Ask questions, nod, smile, and repeat what you have heard periodically to make sure you understand.

·Make the other person feel comfortable when they are talking to you.

·Make sure that your listener has understood your last point before proceeding.

·Try to emphasize your similarities, either of interest or experience.You can use these to make a point clearer or to gain understanding.

·Relate your topic to a story.People tend to remember scripts and stories much better than long streams of meaningless facts.

·Use diagrams or something in the environment that you can both see and understand to convey ideas that are more visual.

·If you have some points that you need to convey, repeat them just before closing the conversation.Another good trick is to get the other person to summarize or repeat what you said (usually for instructional purposes).

· Be sensitive to the motivations behind the communication.For example, they may be trying to sell you something.Or, sometimes people may be discussing a problem because articulating it is how they solve it.They may not want your help or opinions on the matter.

·Be patient!

Things to Avoid

·Not listening to what the other person is communicating.

·Making assumptions about what the other person is like or is trying to communicate.

·Interrupting / Dominating the conversation

·Speaking faster than the other person can absorb.

·Changing the subject midstream

·Using language that puts the other person on the defensive.

·Closed body language.

·Using transitional utterances ( “You know”, “uh”, “um”, “Right?”).

·Arguing with or criticizing the other person.Unless there is a clearly defined difference in authority or age, this usually tends to reduce your ability to communicate to this person in the future.There are usually alternatives to getting your point across.

What to do if you don’t understand the other person.

·They don’t seem to understand what you’re saying.

You can start by asking them to repeat what they think you said or to ask them what they don’t understand.In a problem solving situation, it may be helpful to ask them questions that will help bring out the point that you’re trying to make.Sometimes this is really just an instance of the last case.

·They are completely uninterested or won’t let you talk.

Communicating with someone who’s not interested in your point of view doesn’t leave you with much room for a meaningful dialogue.But consider that they may have a reason for not wanting to listen at that moment, they may not have the same communication skills that you do, or they’re used to being interrupted

·They don’t seem to want to understand what you’re saying.

Keep in mind that most adults have taken years to form the opinions and ideas that they currently hold.You aren’t going to change that in a short conversation.The best thing you can do is listen and try to understand their point of view.This makes them less defensive and gives them room to save face.It also makes you someone that they won’t feel threatened by and may make them more receptive to hearing your ideas in the future.

What to do if the other person doesn’t seem to understand you.

·They don’t seem to understand what you’re saying.

Find out if this is the case by pausing every now and then to see if they understand what you’re saying.Give them opportunities to ask you questions about what you just said.In a teaching situation, you can ask them to repeat what they think you said or to ask them what they don’t understand.It may be helpful to ask them questions that will help bring out the point that you’re trying to make.

·They are completely uninterested or won’t let you talk.

·They don’t seem to want to understand what you’re saying.

In general, it’s very important that you recognize that the other people you meet will be coming from some diverse backgrounds.Understanding their point of view and what they’re trying to communicate to you is much more important than trying to make sure everyone knows what your opinions are.